Peeing for...WHAT?

The other day my boss brought in his tiny terrier, Brownie, and a couple of my 6th graders and I were playing with him. As we were scratching the dog and giving him kisses, one of the girls, who has a small dog at home, said, "Be careful! Sometimes when little dogs get really happy, they go pee. My dog pees for joy!"

African Elephant

So there was a poster in the faculty lounge and it read...

My five-year-old students are learning to read.
Yesterday one of them pointed at a picture in a zoo book and said,
"Look at that! It's a frickin' elephant!"
I took a deep breath, then asked..."What did you call it?"
"It's a frickin' elephant! It says so on the picture!"
And so it does...
(Picture of an Elephant)
African Elephant

Hooked on phonics! Ain't it wonderful!

Some Teachers Need Velcro

During afterschool free play, I see one of the kindergarteners running around with two untied shoelaces.

    Me: Hey man, let me tie your shoes.

    Boy: But someone just tied them!

    Me: Well let me tie them anyways.

    Boy: [While I'm tying them] And it was another teacher who tied them!

    Me: Well I guess they need to practice then.

    Boy: Yeah. Cuz right now they suck.

I may or may not have laughed.

What are you interested in?

In the lead-up to a library exploration activity, the librarian was asking all the 3rd graders what they were interested in. Answers ranged from "dinosaurs" to "soccer" to "animals" etc. I was really curious what the new kid, a total bad boy with gelled hair, open button-up shirt and gold necklaces, was going to say. Hot babes? Muscle cars? Alcohol and cigarettes? PG-13 cussing?

Nope.

"Dolphins."

Utsi the Hiker/Adding Fuel to the Fire

In my science class, after watching a movie about Utsi, the Alpine Paleolithic hiker who was mummified for thousands of years in the snow/ice:

Teacher: "What did the hiker NOT have on the bottoms of his shoes that made the scientists think he wasn't a shepherd?"
Student: "Contractions!"
Teacher: "I think you mean 'traction.'"

And then, at another point in the same class:
Teacher: "What was he [Utsi] doing up there [in the Alpine range]?"
Student: "Chillin'."

And, lastly, in one of my kids' Language Arts classes the kids had to fill-in-the-blank for a comprehension "Do-Now" addressing figurative language. The prompt said:
"I was already angry with you, and when you forgot to pick me up, that really added fuel to the fire. I think this figurative language means:________________."
My favorite answer was the following: "I think this figurative language means: that they needed gasoline in there [sic] car."

Say it, don't Beatbox it!

I was doing sign-in for the beginning of our afterschool program. There are these three boys that love to mess with each other while their signing in. Today one of the boys starts intentionally spitting while he beat-boxes right in front of the other two's faces. The simultaneous reply, "EWW, GROSS!!"

Alright, Folks--

Let's hear them: your kids' cutest, funniest, and most heartwarming moments. Post Away!